


Thoughts

by tea_and_outer_space



Category: Zombies Run!
Genre: A Voice in The Dark, Gen, the ship is only if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-05-28
Packaged: 2018-04-01 17:33:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4028677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tea_and_outer_space/pseuds/tea_and_outer_space
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam's talking in her ear, and she's half tempted to turn him off.<br/>-<br/>Or, Runner Five's thoughts during A Voice In The Dark</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> My first Zombies, Run fanfic! It's basically bases off my headcanon for Runner Five, what I think she would have thought during A Voice In The Dark. The writing style is a bit odd, but I still like how it turned out.  
> Also, I'm only eleven episodes in, so if I said anything that is proved to be wrong in a later mission, that's why.  
> Anyway, hope you enjoy!

Sam's talking in her ear, and she's half tempted to turn him off.

Which, of course, would be stupid.

According to all of her training, according to everything everyone at Abel has told her, according to common sense, it'd be stupid.

She is heading back to Abel, and maybe she'll stay like that.

But the thought of snapping her headset in half and dropping it, spinning around to the other direction, it's so tempting.

Sam's musing about how she may have turned into a zom, and of course that didn't happen, because she isn't that lucky.

In her own opinion, the ones that turned in the beginning were the lucky ones. The ones who were caught up in the first waves, dead before the world went to shit, they were the ones that got it the best.

And, maybe, maybe she wishes that she was one of them.

That she wasn't saved, and that her rescuer didn't drop her off at a military base, and that she wasn't shoehorned into helping there, and that her helicopter didn't crash.

And she wasn't roped into living at Abel.

The food's okay, better than the military rations. Sam and the others are nice, save for a few. It is a bit comforting to know that at the end of the day she has a mattress waiting for her.

Everyone in the apocalypse has talked about the 'fall of civilization', how rules no longer exist, obligations aren't real.

Which is a load of fucking bullshit, she thinks.

Every time she goes out on a run, it feels like there's a rope around her hips, a tether from her to Abel. There's the weight of people counting on her on her shoulders, and there's a voice in her ear that's a constant reminder her of who she'll hurt if she doesn't come back.

And so, she always comes back.

But it's night, and Sam thinks she's dead, and hell, she's probably going to die soon, so maybe this time will be different.

The thought has struck her so many times, turning and leaving and never coming back.

Not joining another town, or group, or _anything._

Making it out on her own, with no ties and no obligations. What the end of the world should be, absolute freedom.  
Sam switches the conversation to his past life, and tosses in an off-handed comment.

“Y'know, I bet you had a good life.”

And it's funny, because Sam couldn't be more wrong.

Sometimes the runners would talk. Before, a few worked out at gyms, a few ran track in high school, a few just jogged in the park. She never divulged her reasons as to why she was good at running, but the others would guess, and she'd just shake her head no to all of them.

No one ever guessed that she ran because she _needed_ to run.

Sam talks for a little bit more, about how maybe she had a nice job, nice friends, nice house, nice parents.

She frowns a little.

Sam is a bit hit or miss, either he gets something completely, or he's totally clueless.

He's definitely being the latter right now.

Because maybe if he noticed a bit more, he'd know that people like her, who can cut a zom's head off without a seconds hesitation, or put a bullet into a bite victim without blinking, or weave through herds wearing a face of stone, maybe he'd know that people like that don't have nice, tidy pasts.

Sam goes on, and he talks about parents and siblings and ice cream rolls.

She listens.

There's the sound of leaves and hard packed dirt under her feet, and him rambling away in her ear.

She still walks in the direction of Abel, and there's the pricking reminder in the back of her head that it's her chance.

She's still out of range of Sam's cameras, and she's still out of sight from Abel.

And turning around would be so fucking easy right now.

It's dark and it's cloudy, and pointed up in the distance is a bright red beacon.

Her first thought is that the gates are still open, and that light will draw zoms to Abel like moths to a flame, and her second thought is that they're willing to go through that, for her.

She nearly died, once.

Multiple times, actually, but once stands out in particular.

The gates of the military based were closed on her, and she was counted for dead already, and if it wasn't for quick thinking and even quicker gate scaling, she'd have been a zombie a long time ago.

And she did have her friends back there in the base, but it was more of a 'we need each other to live' sort of relationship, rather than the more genuine one she had at Abel.

If Sam or Janine or Eight or anyone asked her to spill her story, she'd turn them down. It wasn't even just the speech barrier, she was selective about trust, even more so after things went to shit.

But Sam apparently has no such reservations.

He's talking, and since she went out, he hasn't stopped.

He has a probably dead sister, and definitely dead parents.

He was going to school for engineering, and he hated it with a passion.

He loves radio.

And even if she turns around, she's going to have his voice in her ears, talking about everything under the sun, until she breaks her headset.

Even then, she'll have his voice ringing in her head for a long time.

She'll be stuck with the knowledge that he has a maybe dead lawyer sister, dead parents, and a love for ice cream rolls.

The red light's even closer, and if she squints a little she can maybe see the gates.

She stops.

It's the unspoken rule of the zombie apocalypse that you _never stop_ , but she stops dead in her tracks.

Sam mentions that she only has a few more minutes to make it to the gates.

She takes in a deep breath.

She's brought back to just a year ago, where her old base's gates were closed and headset feeds were turned off without even a goodbye.

And a few years before that, where being kicked out of foster homes and having people give up on her was a common occurrence.

Sam's voice is what draws her back, something tired and sad and still brimming with the underlying tone of hope.

She _sprints_.

Maybe she only exists to be alone, and maybe everyone who's ever meant shit to her has dropped her like she was nothing.

But there's a guy who spent nearly a whole night talking to a woman he barely knew who might be dead, and maybe a person like that is worth sticking around a bit longer for.

Sam half shouts from happiness, she can hear the relief in his voice, clear as day.

She tells herself that this will still be temporary. Abel Township will not be her home. She's never had a permanent one, and this town, these people, it will be no different.

Maybe she's lying to herself.

Either way, she grins as she sprints through the gates.


End file.
